Jamaican me crazy

My brain isn't much attuned to actual thought processes right now, but the tidbits that are extractable and understandable are there...

My wonderful boyfriend was here over the weekend and we had a fabulous time.

Bob and I went to church on Sat thinking it started at 5:30...oops. It actually started at 4:30 and we walked in just as communion was starting. The couple of middle-agers we sat in front of gave me dirty looks when we sat down. It seemed to confirm my suspicion that I'm going to hell.

I desperately need to shower.

Our apt smells like Satan took a shit in a dark, hidden corner somewhere. Kate suspects a dead rodent in the heating vents. Like I told her, I'm not allowed to call the landlord in regards to any bad smells...I think I've abused that privilege quite enough for one year.

Must quit smoking.

I've come to the conclusion that taking walks with Bob is one of my top 5 favorite things to do, with "tormenting Kate" coming in at a close 6th place.

2 bottles of champagne in one night makes Maryann's head hurt the next morning.

In addition to having a designated back scratcher on my payroll, I also need someone to peel oranges for me.

Nice-looking asses on other girls are just as much of a priority to girls as they are to guys.

Bella is a "special" kitty.

My new BC conveniently makes my period week about 3 days shorter than before. Or so I am to believe...

I need to go to the bathroom. Bye bye.